Self Love or Narcissism?

While researching self love last night I stumbled upon one article after another on narcissism.
Honestly, this blew me away! How many of us have been taught that self love and care is selfish and narcissistic? How can we honestly expect to offer others genuine love and empathy if we cannot first learn to love and accept all parts of ourselves?


ˈˌself ˈləv/


regard for one’s own well-being and happiness (chiefly considered as a desirable rather than narcissistic characteristic).

Empathy is created by being fully present with our OWN pain and suffering, we then express love and compassion to others freely in the most authentic way.

At the root of narcissism is an individual who does not know how to authentically love and accept themself. They therefore overcompensate to try and gain approval from outside sources to fill this love deficit, the void.

But deep down they know they are wounded, broken individuals and must constantly attempt to prove their worth.

An individual who is truly secure within themself has no need for constant validation.

This process, however is not quite so black and white as one must first be willing to remove the years worth of conditioning that create these false beliefs and woundings to begin with. This is an extremely painful process and it certainly is far from linear as each layer is peeled away and one goes deeper into the void.

The difference, however is you will see evidence of growth over time in those willing to submit to this painful process, and on the flip side you will see continual patterns of dysfunction and wounding in those who refuse to do the work. Healthy self love is the key to healthy relationships.

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