Destiny-Chance or Choice?

I came across a post this morning on Facebook.  You know, one of those cheezy memes set to a beautiful background of ocean, mountain, etc.  The message: 

“Destiny isn’t a matter of chance, but of choice”.

I pondered this for a good while over a steaming cup of Masala Chai.  How many of us can look back over our lives and recognize, in retrospect how many wonderful opportunities we’d missed out on due to our own deep seated insecurities and fears?

Be it love, career choices, location etc. anything that presented itself with that initial seed of passion, yet were carelessly tossed aside on to the rocky soil to die. The graveyard of regret.

I believe we are presented with these ‘Seeds of chance’ regularly, yet we become almost paralyzed by fear of the unknown.  Sadly, more often than not we choose instead , safety and familiarity even if our current choices lack fulfillment , joy, satisfaction and happiness. 

It’s safe, we know what we are getting and have no fear of those surprise curve balls that life might threaten us with, “no risk, no loss” becomes our new mantra.

So, we continue to survive, we continue on in the same life draining scenarios and patterns, hoping and praying that something will eventually give. Hoping for a miracle,longing for the fruit, while tossing the seeds one by one into the wasteland of regret.

What I’ve discovered is that in order to reach that place of fulfillment, satisfaction and happiness we must face our fears head on , and through wobbly legs and trembling hands dare to take the risk. 

Nothing of true value can be obtained through complacency but almost always involves sacrifice and a willingness to take a risk of some sort.

What do we desire? True love, a soulmate? Then we must risk having our heart potentially shattered. A true soulmate connection requires vulnerability and authenticity, there’s just no way around it, yet if our risk pays off we are given a rare, precious gift. A new business? We must risk potential financial loss. Close friendship? We must risk the possibility of deep betrayal. 

While many do indeed choose the path of least resistance, perceived security and safety, this path almost always leads to deep, haunting regret. 

If we can learn to embrace the risk and follow our hearts, even if there is indeed loss associated with those risks, our losses can become our greatest teachers. So in reality can there ever really be such deep loss?  We remain safe, yet empty, or we take the leap and are presented with either the deepest blessings or the most profound lessons. 

Destiny, chance or choice? I’d have to say yes to both. We are presented with the seeds of ‘chance’ throughout our lives, however we have the freedom of ‘choice’ to cast those seeds into the graveyard of regret or plant them in the fertile soil of our hearts, nurturing them with tender care and patience into full fruition.


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