i don’t think there is anything more fulfilling then getting to that place where we not only learn to tolerate our uniqueness, but actually embrace it. Those little idiosyncrasies that were once buried out of fear;fear of judgement, rejection etc. eventually we begin to view them as our greatest assets. And then the magic. We meet others who not only tolerate them, but are inspired by them and embrace them.
This has been a longing of mine for as far back as I can remember. There have been very few in my life who understand me, truly know the real me. I can’t tell you the number of people I’ve encountered that have misunderstood the way I think, who I really am, my true thought and intentions. I think this is at the heart of my longing.
Although I share openly much of my ‘story’ there have been very few in my life who I have completely opened my heart to, who I’ve allowed in that deep place, that intimate place. There’s a quote I came across a while back that really struck a chord with me.
Isn’t that what most of us are longing for? To not only find understanding, but acceptance of our inner mysteries, to truly know and be known without fear or insecurity. I often feel very disconnected on a soul level from most people. This causes a lot of turmoil within, especially in the area of love. I am a person very comfortable with solitude. I create my own adventures and connect deeply with nature, animals, family, God. Yet to share my inner world with a lover, to share in the fascination and wonder of our inner complexities and truly feel understood, or at the very least ‘heard’ seems like a fantasy, it is rare indeed.
I often question whether this is indeed something that even exists, or some silly dream that blocks me from relationship with others. But deep inside, I know it exists and cannot settle for anything less.